I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
