Need sex. Gaining weight.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
