Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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