i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
I want your puppy
I meant pussy
I would rather you take my puppy
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
