You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
