Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
