I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize