Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
