Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
