We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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