I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
