What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Randomize
