so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I didn't think moms care packages could get better than greygoose, weed & double stuffed oreos, but she just snet me a chocolate bar full of mushrooms.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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