Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
