Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
