I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
