Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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