You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Randomize
