This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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