haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I want to fling myself into the sun
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
