so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
is it fun? or sober?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
Randomize
