In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
Randomize
