too bad you live with your parents still
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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