11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
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