Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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