I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
This is so pathetic it makes me miss snorting lines alone in my room listening to 'one more drink'.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Randomize