Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
Randomize
