i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
