we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
