the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
