I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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