Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize