walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
