I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
