I showed him my bush... on skype.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
