Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
