Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
Randomize