I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
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