This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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