it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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