it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
I think my moral compass just broke
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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