she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
