This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Randomize
