we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
Randomize