mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
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