dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
i think my cat just said my name.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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