I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
