I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
