i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Randomize
