He is such a slut. More and more my type.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
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