plz talk dirty to me
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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